Saturday, May 31, 2008
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Microsoft . . .
Those lovely folks at microsoft:
One of Microsoft Network's finest support techs was drafted into the Army and sent to boot camp.
At the rifle range, he was given some instructions, handed a rifle, and a couple rounds of ammo.
He loaded the rifle and fired several shots at the target which was fifty yards away.
The report came from the target area that all of his attempts had completely missed the target.
The tech looked at his rifle, and then at the target.
He looked at the rifle again, and then once more at the target.
He placed his finger over the end of the rifle barrel and squeezed the trigger with his other hand.
The end of his finger was blown off -- whereupon he yelled toward the
target area... "It's leaving here just fine; the trouble must be at
your end!"
________________________________________________________________________________________
A helicopter pilot is flying to Seattle, and hits a pea-soup-thick
fogbank. He becomes disoriented, and flies blindly around until he
nearly runs into the top few floors of an office building. He recovers
in time to avoid crashing, and manages to get the attention of a woman
sitting at her desk.
"Excuse me!" he yells. "Where am I?"
"You're in a helicopter," she replies.
"Thank you." says the pilot.
The pilot pulls off sharply to the left, takes one or two crisp turns
through the dense fog, and then does a perfect landing at the
Seattle-Tacoma airport.
"That was amazing!" says a passenger. "How did you figure out where you
were?" "Easy," says the pilot. "Her answer, while correct, was
absolutely useless. So I immediately knew I was at Microsoft technical
support."
Monday, May 12, 2008
Living the Under-employed life
Artie speaks:
Hey crackernuts, how's it hanging?
Well I got shit-canned from my cushy cubicle job 'cause I spen too much time oogling the young broads and the college intern chickee's in the building.
Hell how did I know they were gonna pop me for sticking the camera up there like that. or taking pictures when they were licking their swizzle sticks. you know . . . those little wood pieces of shit-for their coffee . . . speaking of wood.
Anyway, I'm now a frickin' consultant, and i work when i want, hell I even set at the typewriter naked-thinking about little wooden swizzle sticks. Take that you pompous suit wearing office wankers,
Freelancer . . . . . . . . that's me suckers, now you can all kiss my ass.
Friday, May 9, 2008
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)